Better Days
by ALynette1
Summary: This takes place after the electrical closet action. It won't be pretty.
1. Chapter 1

The idea just came to me and I had to write it. Really just getting into the crux of Fitz's anger, especially where Olivia is concerned. Rated M for language.

* * *

The day's events were replaying over and over in Olivia's mind. From the sex in the electrical closet to Fitz telling her that even though he might not be able to control his erections around her, he didn't want her and coming home and drinking one too many glasses of wine, this had been the day from hell. And the persistent knocking that was coming from her front door wasn't making it any better. "Go away!" Olivia yelled from her spot on the floor, in front of her coffee table. After taking a shower and grabbing her wine, that was as far as she made it. The knocking stopped and Olivia silently thanked God. And then it started again, this time more forceful. "What do you want?!" Olivia asked opening the door, not looking to see who it was.

"You said it was a mistake so I'm giving you 10 minutes to explain yourself." Fitz's tone was void of emotion. He simply sidestepped Olivia as he entered her apartment, closing the door behind him.

"When I tried to explain you didn't want to hear it so you can't come here and demand I explain myself." Olivia folded her arms across her chest, immediately getting defensive.

"Dammit you will explain!" Fitz's voice boomed. "I've had it up to my eyeballs with your passive aggressive bullshit! You fucked up Liv! You don't get to cry your way out of this. You need to explain why the hell you keep making decisions for me!"

"I did it because I love you. I wanted you to win so badly. I knew how much you wanted to be president. I see now that it was a mistake but at the time I didn't see any other way." Olivia sat down on the couch, rubbing her temples.

"There was another way. You should have let me lose! But you all selfishly took it upon yourselves to play God. You…you keep doing this to me. You keep trying to run my life the way _you_ think it should be. I'm not some child you need to coddle. I'm a grown ass man and I could've handled losing."

"But the things your father said to you. And you asking me after his funeral if I thought you'd make a good president…I wouldn't deny you the one thing you wanted most. It's a mistake I wish I could take back but I can't." Liv stood up so she could look Fitz in the eyes.

"You still don't get it. You and Mellie and Cyrus never ask me what I want! You just decide what you think I want and what you think is best for me and I'm tired of it! And fuck all this mistake talk. That was straight betrayal!"

"What else do you want me to call it? Yes I knew that if you found out you'd be upset, and you have that right, but it wasn't done out of malice. Fitz, you know me." Olivia pleaded.

"I _thought _I knew you but I obviously don't. Because the Olivia I thought I knew was always honest with me. Painfully so at times. But the woman standing before me, I don't know who she is. I don't recognize her." Fitz sighed, running his hands through his hair.

"So is that why you fucked me in that closet like I was some whore? Is that who you think I am now?" Olivia closed the gap between them, getting into Fitz's personal space.

"You don't get to do this! You don't get to throw that in my face! Nobody made you be with me in that closet. You could have left after you slapped me. You're nobody's victim Olivia!"

"And neither are you! You act like you've never made mistakes. What was Amanda Tanner then? Was she not a mistake? And you had the nerve to bring me in to clean up that mess. You blatantly lied to my damn face Fitzgerald!" Olivia began to pace back and forth. "So is one betrayal bigger than the other? Or is it just when you're the one feeling betrayed that it's so damn unforgivable?"

"Oh you don't get to throw that in my face and make it seem like the two can be compared. I fucked that girl _once_! You had left. You're not my wife. I didn't owe you anything. But you stole the God damned Presidential Election Olivia! Everything I've done the past three years have been based on a lie! Don't you see the magnitude of what you all have done?" Fitz's anger was reaching it's boiling point.

"There were four other people involved yet I'm getting the brunt of your punishment! Do you think that is fair Fitz? Huh?"

"I don't love the others! I love you. I love you and you lied to me for years! Years Olivia! And you didn't even have the decency to tell me yourself after everything threatened to come out. You were just going to continue to keep me in the dark. And you claim that you did this out of love…" Fitz scoffed. "You don't do that to people you love Liv. You don't hurt them the way I've been hurting for the past ten months."

"And you think this has been easy for me Fitz? For the past ten months I haven't been able to sleep. All thought are consumed by you. So I know a little bit about pain from the one you love. I had finally given in and decided I would wait for you and you just said fuck it."

"There are things you don't know. And I can't be with someone I don't trust. I can't believe anything out of your mouth right now. You've told me we were in this together before and you left, so I'm not putting too much stock in anything you have to say. I don't think I'll even trust you again." Fitz's anger was subsiding and it was being replaced with heartache.

"You know what, you're right. I should've known better than to get into bed with Verna and Hollis and Mellie and Cyrus. But I should have also known better than to get into bed with you. The past three years of my life have been one huge mistake." Olivia said, knowing that her last sentence was a lie.

"Fuck you Liv! You can't hurt me anymore than you already have. And keep lying to yourself. Lord knows you lie to everyone else."

"Fuck me?! Really Fitz?! Fuck you too!" Olivia yelled through tears "I wish I had turned Cyrus down when he asked me to come help you. I wish I had never met you. I fucking hate you for making me fall in love with you! Do you understand that I hate you right now?!"

"I can't find it in me to care how you feel right now! My feelings were never taken into consideration by you! So again, fuck you! And I'm done with you!" Fitz opened the door and left without saying another word.


	2. Chapter 2

As soon as Fitz got back to his office he poured himself a drink. And then he poured another one. And another one. He wanted to drink as much as he could to make his brain shut off. To make him forget everything that had happened between them. To make him hate her. He wanted to hate Olivia. Because if he hated her, that meant that the aching in his chest wouldn't be there. Because the pain he was feeling was only caused by loving someone and them breaking your heart. He thought that if he talked to her and let her explain the reasoning behind Defiance, he'd feel better. That was a lie. He felt even worse now. The things he said to her. The way he said them to her were nothing but disrespectful. Hemming her up in the electrical closet was disrespectful. Afterwards he could barely look at himself in the mirror. He didn't recognize the person he was anymore. The Fitz everyone knew died ten months ago and was replaced with an angry, alcoholic murderer.

And that sickened him. But what sickened him the most was that he was a hypocrite. He was condemning Liv for lying to him when he'd killed a woman. Although she was on her death bed and had just confessed to trying to kill him, Fitz murdered Verna. That made him feel like a monster. And he didn't want Olivia to be with a monster. Regardless of what she'd done, she didn't deserve to be with a monster. That's part of the reason he was still with Mellie. She deserved this version of him. He was going to make her pay. And who better to make an animal pay than a monster.

After drinking enough to rival a college student on any given Friday night, Fitz headed up to the residence. He quietly went into the nursery and peaked in at his sleeping son. That little boy had been his only beacon of light in the darkness that was his life. After watching his son sleep for a few minutes, Fitz left and made his way to his bedroom. Without a word he walked past his wife and went straight into the bathroom. Locking the door, he stripped down and got into the shower. He let the warm water wash over his and then the dam that had been holding his emotions at bay for the past ten months finally broke. Fitz slid down the wall and sat on the floor of the shower and cried. He cried because of the things he had done. Cried because of the pain and anger he was feeling. Cried because he was so heartbroken and missing the love of his life. This was him finally mourning the end of something he had held so dear.

After sitting on the floor for what felt like hours, Fitz finally found the strength to wash himself and pull it together. He came out of the bedroom to see Mellie sitting up with an worried expression on her face. "Are you alright? You were in there so long I thought something had happened to you. I went to the door but it was locked."

"You don't need to worry about me. I'm perfectly fine. I mean why wouldn't I be?" Fitz asked sarcastically.

"Because you're going through a lot. And the people closest to you betrayed you, myself included. I just want you to know that I'm here for you and that you can trust me. I'm really the only one you can trust. You certainly can't trust Cyrus since this was all his idea." Mellie lied almost flawlessly. If only Fitz didn't know Hollis came up with the idea.

"Yeah, it's just me and you. You're all I have left. I can't trust anyone else." Fitz gave Mellie a weak smile and she smiled back. He knew she was proud of the lie she had just told. Yes he was definitely going to make her pay.

* * *

"She's feeling his head with so much bullshit that I don't know what to do. I mean he's actually trusting her Liv!" Cyrus plopped down on the couch next to Olivia and grabbed the glass of wine sitting on the table in front of him. "I've got to do something though. She's going to drive this country into the ground playing pseudo president."

"Let the bitch hang herself Cy. You know she will. She's her own worse enemy. She'll overplay her hand like she always does. She can't stop when she's ahead. And when she fucks up, and you know she will, go for the jugular. Pull no punches." Liv looked over at Cyrus and gave a weak smile.

"You're right. This is just a clusterfuck. This is bad Liv. Really, _really _bad. This is destroying you both. It's painful to watch you both try to cope with this."

"I'll be alright Cy. You just keep an eye on him. He's broken and I don't know if he'll ever fully heal. It's going to take time but with the job he has, he can't just take a leave of absence to get it together. So just be there for him. He'll eventually let you back in." Olivia scooted closer to Cyrus and laid her head on his shoulder.

"He needs to let you back in too. It's not fair that he's punishing you the most. You were the only one that gained nothing from it." Cyrus tried to comfort the woman who he looked at as a niece. Or sometimes even a daughter.

"I was the one who was supposed to believe in him. And I did. I still do, but he sees that as the biggest betrayal. Because I was in on it. I'm sorry I did it but I can't take it back. Fitz came by a couple weeks ago. It was heated to say the least. Things were said on both sides so yeah, it's pretty much over and done. I love him and he hates me. He's pushed me away. I see how he felt all those times I left him. Hurts more than I could ever imagine."

"He could never hate you Liv. He loves you too much for that. And while he's hurting, that's no excuse to treat you like this. It's been ten months now. It's getting late and I want to tuck the little one in before she's out like a light." Cyrus kissed Liv on the side of her head. "Call me if you need anything."

* * *

"Sir, you're going to need to look over these briefs before your meeting with the General at 2." Cyrus said as he followed Fitz into the Oval.

"Sure." Fitz took the briefs from Cyrus as the older man stared at him. "Something on your mind Cy?"

"Yes. I saw Olivia last night. She's not doing well. But I assume you already know that." Cyrus stood in front of Fitz's desk, gauging his reaction. He saw his jaw tighten at the mention of Olivia but he continued. "She understands your anger but it's been ten months Fitz! Let up on her. Stop punishing her as if she acted alone."

"No she didn't act alone but she should have known better!" Fitz didn't want to have this conversation. Not right now.

"Just like you shouldn't known better when you screwed a White House aide and had your girlfriend come clean it up. And she forgave you for lying to her about Amanda Tanner. A lie is a lie is a lie. No matter how you dress it up and put lipstick on it. One lie and betrayal doesn't negate another. Yes she was hurt and angry, but she didn't torture you with it."

"Cy, I really need to look over this brief."

"Yes you do. But you also need to let the love of your life back in. And that's your description of her, not mine."

* * *

"You guys, something is wrong. I can feel it." Abby whispered in the hallway as she looked into Olivia's office. "She's pacing in circles She's been doing that for the past hour, none stop."

"How do you know something is wrong?" Quinn asked. "She's always like this. You know Liv doesn't talk about stuff."

"Yeah yeah. But this is different. After we learned about the election, we had made some headway. Everybody put their secrets out there. She's holding back. Something is bothering her. And it's not about her breakup with Edison. It's like she's on auto pilot. And I don't want to just stand by and watch her crash."

Harrison grumbled but he knew Abby had a point. Olivia had definitely been different. "Abby do not push her. You know she'll only retreat that much more inward. She'll talk when she's ready."

"How long was she in bed the last time she got like this? Four _freaking_ days! I'm telling you Harrison, the past two and a half months, she's been here but not really here. Something major is going on and I'm going to find out."

"Abby!" Harrison whispered slightly. "You can't push."

Olivia could hear her employee's in the hall but didn't have it in her to care that they were talking about her. Her mind was a haze of fog and she didn't know what to do. Her life was going from bad to worse. She couldn't get the past two hours out of her head. She had been feeling sluggish and nauseous lately and thought she may have been coming down with the flu so she decided to go to the doctor. Olivia wasn't prepared for what she found out. Oh how she wished it was the flu. But instead she was pregnant. Pregnant with a child of a man who wanted nothing to do with her.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Things get interesting from here on out. I don't know exactly how many chapters I'm going to write because there is so much I want to cover but I do know how I want to end the story. This chapter contains a lot of Olitz. Enjoy!**

* * *

Pregnant. That one word had been in Olivia's head the past two weeks and she still couldn't wrap her mind around it. For the past two weeks she's taken her prenatal vitamins and ate meals that consisted of more than popcorn, but she still couldn't believe she was pregnant. As she got out of the shower and wrapped the towel around her petite frame, Olivia put her hand over her small baby bump. Being three months pregnant, she knew she wouldn't be able to hide her pregnancy much longer. The only person besides her doctor that knew Liv was pregnant was her sister Jasmine and she had been nothing but supportive.

"Little one, what are we going to do, huh?" Olivia asked rubbing her stomach after she got dressed in yoga pants and a comfy sweatshirt. "We won't be able to hide you much longer." Liv sat at the foot of her bed and lets the tears flow. Since becoming pregnant she'd been crying just because, her hormones turning her into a blubbering mess at any given moment. But tonight it was because she felt she was all alone. This was a time where most women were happy and sharing that with the father of their child, whether it was a husband, fiancé or boyfriend. And she had neither. The father of her child, the love of her life was the most powerful man in the world and she didn't know how to tell Fitz she was pregnant with his child. At times Olivia didn't know if she would even tell Fitz. Maybe she could go away for the next year and come back after she had her baby. But she couldn't be that selfish. She couldn't cheat her son or daughter out of their father knowing about them. And as much as she wanted to hate Fitz, she knew he'd love this baby as much as he did his other children and she didn't want him to not know about the baby, even though she had decided he couldn't be a part of their lives. She knew Fitz wouldn't like that idea and fight tooth and nail to be there for their baby but Olivia was digging her heels in on that subject.

Olivia grabbed the box of tissue from her night stand and dabbed her eyes with a piece. "Baby, we're going to have to tell daddy about you soon. I'm just so scared." Olivia's hand instinctively went to her stomach, rubbing gentle circles.

* * *

Fitz was going absolutely crazy on the inside. It had been three months since he'd seen Olivia. And in those three months he'd been more depressed than he was in the previous ten months. His heart literally ached for her. He wasn't even mad at her anymore but he didn't know how to fix the things he'd done. He couldn't take back the words he said to her. He couldn't take back what happened in the electrical closet. He'd periodically ask Cyrus how she was doing and all he'd get back in reply was _"How do you think she'd doing Fitz?"_. If only he could call or see her so he could explain himself and apologize. Maybe then they both could start to heal. Fitz leaned his head back against the back of his chair and closed his eyes. This was the first time he could even began to relax that day and it was being interrupted by the voice he heard outside his door. Before he could open his eyes good, the door to the Oval opened and in walked Mellie with their son Teddy. She immediately walked over the Fitz and sat the child in his lap and put the diaper bag in the chair beside his desk.

"I have a meeting to get to and he was cranky so I figured some time with you would do you both some good." Mellie left the room as quickly as she had entered it.

* * *

Fitz spent the next hour sitting on the floor and playing with Teddy. His children really were the only thing keeping him remotely sane for the past year. Once the little boy fell asleep, Fitz took his son to the nursery where Teddy's nanny was waiting. After kissing his son on the head, Fitz headed to Cyrus' office. He had had enough of not talking to or seeing Olivia and he needed Cyrus' help. Knocking on the door once, he heard a voice say come in. He expected Cyrus to be alone and was shocked and frozen in place as he saw Olivia standing in the office. It was like time stopped and Fitz forgot how to breath. _"God, she's so beautiful." _was the only thing Fitz could think.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know you were in the middle of something." Fitz said, but his eyes never left Olivia's face.

"Liv and I were just catching up." Cyrus gave Olivia a questioning look, silently asking if she wanted him to leave the room. She had just told him about her pregnancy. Liv nodded her head yes slightly. "I think you two need to talk so I'll give you some privacy." Cyrus grabbed a few files from his desk and left the office.

"It's good to see you Olivia." Fitz didn't want to be too informal with Liv. He had to keep his emotions at bay for the moment.

"Look, I have something I need to tell you. I was going to have Cyrus see if you had a break in your schedule…" Olivia looked down at her feet and subconsciously put her hand on her stomach for a moment and began rubbing it. Realizing what she was doing, she quickly stopped and ran her hands nervously through her hair.

"I've been wanting to talk to you for the past three months but I just didn't know what to say or do. 'I'm sorry' just wasn't enough to begin to apologize for my words and actions." Fitz gave Olivia a nervous smile.

"We both said and did things we can't take back so there is no use in trying to do so. I want to move past that. I forgive you for whatever you've done and I hope you can do the same." Again Olivia's hand went to her stomach but Fitz didn't notice because his eyes never left her face.

"I forgave you a while ago Liv. I'm sorry if you felt like I hated you. That's the farthest thing from the truth. I was just hurt and wanted you to hurt like I was. Now I know that was so wrong of me. We're adults and we should have been able to talk thing out instead of me lashing out like a petulant child."

"I really need to tell you something and I think you should sit down." Olivia wanted to get this over with while she still had the courage and could keep her emotions somewhat in check.

"Sure, I'm here to listen to whatever you have to say Liv." Fitz sat down behind Cyrus' desk as he watched Olivia pace in circles. He knew then that whatever she had to say was huge.

"Two weeks ago I went to the doctor because I was feeling like shit and I thought I had the flu. I mean it's winter in DC so that's the normal thing to think right?" Olivia rambled, causing Fitz to raise an eyebrow but he didn't interrupt her.

"Anyway, the doctor ran test and I just knew she was going to tell me that I was right and that I had the flu. But she didn't." Olivia looked at Fitz to gauge his reaction and it was a look of confusion. "Fitz…I'm…I'm…three months preg…pregnant." Olivia stuttered out as tears began to pool in her eyes.

At that moment Fitz felt like his heart was about to erupt from his chest. He had to have heard her wrong. Did Olivia just say she was pregnant? He watched as she continued to pace. "Stop pacing." Fitz said, getting up from the desk and putting his hand on Olivia's wrist. "You're pregnant? When?" And then it dawned on Fitz. "The day of Ella's christening."

Olivia nodded her head and put her hand on her stomach. This time Fitz noticed and quickly covered her hand with his. This was their baby. The love of his life had just told him she was pregnant with his baby. He'd been trying his best to hold back his emotions but at that moment, Fitz could no longer. He dropped to his knees and wrapped his arms around Olivia, resting his head on her slight baby bump and cried. "Baby I'm so happy. I love you so much." Fitz choked out through his tears.

"Fitz…" Olivia whispered as she ran her hands through his curls. She was a ball of confusion. On one hand she was happy that Fitz was happy about the baby. But on the other, she didn't know what to do. This changed nothing between them. If anything it complicated things more. She could handle the backlash and the name calling but she wasn't going to allow her child to be subjected to the cruelty that would certainly follow once the world learn he or she was the product of her affair with Fitz. "Fitzgerald!" Olivia said with more force, making sure she got Fitz's attention.

Fitz pulled away from the embrace and rose to his feet. Looking at Olivia he knew he didn't want to hear what she had to say. "No Liv, no!" He answered before she could even speak.

"We can't pick up where we left off a year ago. This changes nothing."

"Baby it changes everything! This is our chance to finally be together. We are in love and we're having a baby. This little person…" Fitz paused as he put his hands on Olivia's stomach, "is half you and half me. This is the child I've dreamed about so many nights. Do you know how badly I've wanted a part of you to always remind us of the love we have for each other? This little boy or little girl is it. I've pictured a little girl with honey blonde curls, your cheekbones and lips, my eyes and skin the color of caramel. And a little boy with my nose and smile but your beautiful brown doe eyes. Both the perfect mix of us. Don't deny our family this." Fitz pleaded.

"It's not that simple. When I told you I'd wait for you, I didn't picture doing it while bringing a new life into the world. My first priority isn't you anymore. It's this baby that I love more than anything on this earth. I'm his or her mother and it's my job to protect them. And I can handle a lot of things but what I won't tolerate is the hatred my child will be subjected to when people find out you're their father." Olivia let the tears run down her face. "I love you Fitz, God knows I do, but this baby is my world now and not even loving you will make me put our baby in a situation where they could be hurt. By words or otherwise."

"What are you saying Liv?" Fitz eyes filed with unshed tears.

"You had a right to know about the baby. But I can't allow my child to be caused any undue pain. I'm going to raise this baby on my own. I can get you pictures and updates by way of Cyrus but you can't and won't be a part of our daily lives. It's for the best and you know that."

"For who's best? Not mine and certainly not our baby's." Fitz sounded defeated. "But I won't fight you on this. I wish you'd reconsider. I want to be a part of our child's life but I understand where you're coming from. Maybe we can come up with something better."

"I didn't make this decision hastily. I just don't see any other way Fitz." Olivia choked back the tears.

"I do. It's so simple baby. Marry me." Fitz looked Olivia dead in the eyes and she knew he was serious.


	4. Chapter 4

"Have you lost your mind?!" Olivia nearly shouted. This fool was looking her dead in the eyes talking about _"marry me" _like he wasn't already married.

"Maybe. But I mean it. I'm going to divorce Mellie and marry you Liv. This is our chance and I'm not going to waste it. I already love our baby and I'm not going to hide him or her like they're less important or loved than Gerry, Karen and Teddy."

"And who said I'd be willing to just up and marry you because you say that's what you're going to do? Did you not hear anything I just said? _My_ child won't be hurt because of our choices Fitz." Olivia began to pace around the office.

"Livvie, just think about it. Please." Fitz extended his arm in front of her to stop her from pacing. He then wrapped his arms around Liv's waist and pulled her to him. "I. Love. You. I love you so, so much. I want our family. I want to make things right for you and our baby. You both mean so much to me. I want all of us to me happy." Fitz rested his forehead against hers.

"It's not that easy. I can't deal with the stress that will come from this Fitz. It's not fair to me or the baby to be this selfish. It's not just us that'll be attacked. And have you thought about your kids? While Teddy is too young to understand, at 16 and 12, Gerry and Karen certainly will." Olivia stepped away from the embrace.

Fitz sighed because as much as he hated to admit it, Olivia was right. This was going to be a mess and his kids would be impacted the most. All four of them, and as a father, it was his job to protect his kids, not cause them to be a part of the media circus that would become their life if everything came out. "I just don't want to miss out on my child's life Liv."

"I know. I know that you want to be there every step of the way but you can't. Like I said, Cyrus can be our go between and he will get pictures and updates to you. That's the best I can do Fitz." Olivia let the tears that had pooled in her eyes drop. She hated how emotional being pregnant made her.

"Don't cry Sweet Baby. I didn't mean to make you cry or put pressure on you." Fitz grabbed her hand and entwined their fingers.

"It's the hormones. Since I found out I was pregnant, I've been a blubbering mess. The other day I was flipping through channels and stopped on some cartoon movie and actually cried when a character died. Now how pathetic is that?" That got a laugh out of both Fitz and Liv. "Do you want to see the sonogram photos? I brought a couple for you, that's if you want them." Olivia went over to her purse and got the photos out, not needing Fitz's reply. She knew he'd want them.

"Thank you so much for this." Fitz took the pictures from Olivia and tears immediately sprung in his eyes as he looked at the pictures of his unborn son or daughter. "This means more to me than you could know." He said trying to hold back tears.

"It's the least I could do. I um, I need to get to the office. I'll keep you up to date with what's going on." Olivia left the office without a backwards glance because she knew if she had looked Fitz in the eyes she would have crumbled right then and there.

* * *

Olivia stepped off the elevator to OPA and immediately became overwhelmed with the smell of Chinese food filling the office. Her stomach began to flip and she bolted for the bathroom to empty the contents of her stomach. After getting herself together she quickly walked to her office, closing the door to block the smell from further engulfing her sense of smell. Sitting in her chair, she leaned back, resting her head on the back of the chair hoping to fight off this last wave of nausea when someone knocked on her door. "Come in."

"Liv are you alright?" Abby walked into the office with a container of takeout. "We went ahead and ordered your favorite." Abby held out the container.

"Thanks but I don't think I can ea-" Olivia's nausea overtook her and she grabbed the trashcan beside her desk.

"Liv, are you sure you're ok? Do you have the flu?" Abby asked her boss after she stood up holding the soiled trashcan liner in her hand.

"Do I look like I'm ok?" Olivia snapped and instantly felt bad about it. "I'm sorry Abby. I didn't mean to snap at you. I'm just dealing with something. Give me a few minutes and I'll come to the conference room and talk to you all." Liv offered a slight smile before making her way down the hall to the bathroom.

* * *

"I know you all have been worried about be lately and I truly love each and every one of you for being concerned." Olivia looked around the room and each member of her team. "I have something very important to tell you but I just don't know how."

"Are you dying? Closing the office? Are you pregnant?" Abby asked, laughing after she asked was she pregnant. The look that washed over Olivia's face stopped Abby mid laugh. "Oh my God! You're pregnant!"

Harrison, Quinn and Huck looked at Olivia and then between each other as if they were reading each others minds. "Are you?" Quinn finally asked.

With a heavy sigh, Olivia answered. "Yes. I'm three months pregnant."

"Three months! I didn't think you had had sex since you dropped Edison." Abby was never one to filter anything she said.

"Abby!" Harrison threw her a look of utter shock.

"What? I just said what we all were thinking."

"This is good news, right?" Quinn looked at Olivia with a nervous smile.

"Yes. This pregnancy wasn't planned but I'm happy about my baby."

"And the father..?" Abby didn't know when to leave well enough alone.

"Isn't going to be involved. And that's all I'm going to say about him Abby." Liv wanted to cut her off before she got started on that subject. And for the next thirty minutes, Olivia answered any questions her team had about her pregnancy.

* * *

"Sir?" Cyrus said as he entered the Oval.

"Hey Cy. Any word?" Fitz was anxious because Olivia had her doctor's appointment the day before.

"Yes, they are both doing good and at the next appointment they should be able to tell the baby's sex." Cyrus reached into his pocket and pulled out an envelope and handed it to Fitz. "These are for you."

"Thanks for doing this Cy. It really means a lot to me." Fitz had forgiven Cyrus for Defiance finally. "The way I had treated you this past year, you didn't owe this to me."

"This is an impossible situation. If I can help two people, who just so happen to be my daughter's godparents in any way I can, I will. I know how much this is killing you both."

"How is she?" Usually Fitz only asked about Olivia in relation to her pregnancy but he wanted to know how she was doing.

"You know Liv. She's tough as nails but she has her moments. The hormones are making her real emotional but for the most part she's alright." Cyrus looked at the younger man and felt sorry for him. "She misses you. And you better not tell her I said that."

"I miss her too. More than I thought humanly possible. But I can't keep hurting her. I have to respect her wishes on this one." Fitz looked back down at the pictures in his hand and smiled wistfully. "I wish I could be there to just hold her and rub her belly. Get up in the middle of the night and get her weird stuff to satisfy those late night cravings. I hate that she has to go through this alone."

"Between Ella and you two, you're making me soft. Jesus!" Cyrus sighed and ran his hands through his thinning hair. "I'm supposed to go to her place for dinner tonight, but I think you should go in my place. You two obviously need a little time together. I will clear your schedule and set everything up with Tom so you can go. She's expecting me at 8." Cyrus knew Olivia was going to have his head on a stake when she found out this was his doing but it would be worth it to stop her and Fitz from wondering around in a lovesick haze.

* * *

At 8 o'clock sharp Olivia's doorbell rang and she answered without looking in the peephole, knowing it was Cyrus. "Right on time. I made your favorite des-" Olivia's stopped mid sentence when she looked up. "Fitz, what are you doing here and where is Cyrus?"

"He sent me in his place." Fitz flashed a panty dropping smile before sidestepping Olivia and walking into her apartment.

Olivia closed the door silently, cursing Cyrus for pulling this stunt. She was going to curse his for real the next time she saw him. "Well come on, lets eat. Baby and I are starving.


	5. Chapter 5

"I didn't know you were such a great cook." Fitz said as he took the last bite of lasagna on his plate.

"Well, it's one of the few things I actually like to cook. I'm more of a popcorn girl, but this little one won't go for that." Olivia laughed as she placed a hand on her stomach.

"Good. Popcorn is hardly a balance meal. And us Grants like to eat." Fitz smiled and reached across the table to grab Liv's free hand. "Thank you for letting me share this meal with you."

"No problem, even though I will be talking to Cyrus about this little stunt. I mean since you were here no need to let the food go to waste. You have to eat." Liv moved her hand from Fitz's and took a sip of water. Him in her home eating dinner had her emotions going haywire. This is what life _could _be like for them. And that was something she couldn't allow herself to fantasize about right now.

"Liv, are you alright?" Fitz asked slightly worried. He knew what she was thinking because he was thinking it too. This is what like would be like if they were together. Coming home to each other and discussing their day over dinner like a normal couple.

Olivia blinked away the tears threatening to fall from her eyes. "Yeah I'm fine. Damn pregnancy hormones, that's all." She gave him a weak smile trying to reassure him that she was fine but they both knew she wasn't.

"If you want me to go I will. The last thing I want to do is upset you or the baby."

"No, it's not that. This is…this is nice. Us just talking about whatever. It's been so long since we've actually done this. Since we were able to talk as friends. I've missed that most. Above anything else, we were friends first." Olivia got up and put her plate in the sink. She had to do something to busy herself.

"You're right. You are my best friend. You've always had my back. I should have never thought anything less." Fitz got up with his plate and stood next to Liv at the sink. "I'm so sorry for hurting you Livvie."

"Lets not do this Fitz. I think we can move past this and at the least be friends. I forgive you for whatever you've done."

"This isn't what I had imagined our lives to be." Fitz leaned on the counter and sighed. "I painted this picture in my mind of our life together but every time I feel I'm so close to it becoming a reality, life throws me a curve ball."

"I know. I wish things could be different. Maybe in another life we could have been, but in this one, fate had other ideas."

"I don't believe that. I just think that we need to focus on what's important to us and strive for that. Sometimes you have to take fate into your own hands." Fitz wrapped his arms around Liv's waist, pulling her body flush against his. "I love you Olivia Carolyn Pope. Nothing on this earth will ever change that." He gave her a smile as he swept a loose piece of hair behind her ear.

"I know you do Fitz. And I love you too but we can't." Olivia looked into his grey orbs and could see him silently pleading with her.

"We can. Just give us the chance. I've been wracking my brain about this and I don't know what's wrong or right but what I do know it that you and this baby are what I want in my life and I love you both so much. I want to rub your belly and put your shoes on when you can't. I want out baby girl or baby boy to know the sound of my voice and I want to feel them kick and see them grow. I don't want to miss out on the things I'd never be able to get back."

"If it was just you and I involved, I'd do it in a heartbeat, but we have children to think about. And while divorcing Mellie may eventually be an afterthought to the public, you having an affair and a love child will not. And that Fitz, I can't deal with. I won't allow my child to be labeled "American's First Bastard" or any variation of that." Olivia pulled away from Fitz and padded down the hall to the living room, sitting on the couch and running her hands through her hair.

Fitz was right behind her and sat beside her, taking one of her tiny hands in both of his. "I will do _whatever _and battle _whoever _I have to in order to make sure you and our child are protected. I mean it Livvie, I'd move heaven and earth to be with you. Will it be easy? No. Will we face some challenges and hard times? Yes. But we can get though it together. We've always been stronger as we stood together. We can fight this together and win."

"You make it sound so simple." Olivia chuckled. "But it's not."

"It doesn't have to be ask complicated as you think it would. Sometimes you over think things Olivia. First thing in the morning, I'm doing something I've wanted to do for months now. I've already had papers drawn up. I'm giving them to Mellie tomorrow, signed. I'm tired of living this lie."

"And then what? You're going to divorce Mellie, who by the way, you know won't go quietly, and move me into the residence? Please I know you're not that delusional. And by some chance Mellie _does _sign the papers, how are you going to explain this to the kids? Karen and Gerry will be crushed."

Fitz tugged his dark curls. Everything Liv had just said was valid. "The kids see the tension between their mother and I. And I'll go for full custody of them because we both know Mellie didn't have kids because she wanted to. She did it for political reasons only."

"It's getting late. I think you should be heading back to the White House." Liv wanted to end this conversation yesterday.

"No, not until you agree to at least think about the possibility of us. I want this Olivia. More than I've ever wanted anything before. If you told me to, I'd resign tomorrow. You don't even have to wait for me because I'm yours. As of right now, I belong to you and only you Liv. If Mellie fights me on the divorce, I'll go after her guns blazing. She has a few secrets that she doesn't think I know about. I'd use whatever I have to, to be free of her so I can openly be yours."

"God there is no fighting you on this is there?" Liv took a deep breath and rubbed her stomach. "Damn why did you have to make me fall in love with you? From that moment, my heart hasn't belonged to me since."

"So…" Fitz looked at Olivia waiting to hear her say the words.

"We're in this together."

"We're in this together." Fitz smiled as he pulled Liv into his lap and kissed her softly.

* * *

It was 4 am before Fitz made it back to the White House. He and Olivia spent the rest of the night talking and cuddling in her bed. It felt so good to just lay with her and wrap his arms around her, rubbing her growing baby bump. He smiled remembering peppering her stomach with kisses and talking it until they both fell asleep.

"Where have you been all night?" Fitz heard as soon as he walked into the residence's master bedroom.

"I had something really important to tend to." Was all the response Fitz gave as he headed for the closet.

"So that could only mean one thing. You went to see Olivia." Mellie's voice was low but it was dripping with venom.

"Mellie, it's late. Or early depending on how you look at it. I just want to take a shower and them spend a little time with my children at breakfast. I don't have time to hear what you have to say."

"Too bad! I thought you had finally gotten her out of your system. Jesus I just don't know what the hell is so special about that woman that you can't function without her!" Mellie shouted.

"It's too long of a list to begin to explain why I love Olivia. But I'll give you the bullet points. She's kind and compassionate and loving. She actually does things for people because it's nice to be nice sometimes instead of doing it to gain something or be owed a favor."

"So I'm the monster and she's the saint? Please! She can get just as down and dirty as I can." Mellie snorted.

"Look, I was going to wait to do this but I don't see any reason in delaying the inevitable." Fitz went into the closet and pulled out a lock box way in the back. Opening it, he took out a folder and handed it to Mellie.

"You have got to be kidding me! Are your out of your brain damaged mind?! You know good and damn well I won't sign this!"

"Oh yes you will! Because my dear wife, if you don't, I'll ruin you." Fitz almost smirked at the look of pure shock on Mellie's face. "And if you try to fight me on this, you won't like how dirty I'll fight back. Let's be amiable about this and I'll endorse you for Congress or Senate. Hell run for Governor if you want. But your days as First Lady are numbered."

"You're bluffing. You'll lose this job and your children will _hate_ you."

"I forgot to add that I'll be filing for full custody of the kids. We both know you're a mother in name only. And they won't hate the only parent that's given a damn about them their whole lives. I don't use them as photo ops and send them off to boarding school or with the nanny the first time they're of no use to me looking like the loving parent I'm not." Fitz casually walked back into the closet, grabbed his suit for the day and went into the bathroom.

Mellie immediately grabbed her cell phone and called her chief of staff. "Sarah, I need you to clear my schedule for today and set up a meeting with Olivia Pope."

* * *

**A/N: So Liv and Fitz finally are "in this together". And he's given Mellie divorce papers. Mellie is such a desperate idiot that she'll fight to keep her position and status as FLOTUS. Will Olivia come to the meeting with Mellie? And if so, will Mellie notice Olivia's growing baby bump?**


End file.
